Yesterday and Today

Yesterday

Yesterday’s happiness report is a little late, because I was out busy being happy last night. I thoroughly enjoyed the Wisconsin in Scotland reunion held at UW-River Falls. I met up with friends, ate great food (and weird food, like haggis), and laughed a lot.

There was the story about how I turned all my underwear blue the first week I was there, and how the fire marshall was giving us a safety talk downstairs while a bed upstairs was bursting into flames because of an untended curling iron, and how I stole a road sign and then brought it back because I felt guilty, and the story about the blind cleaning service…and…and…and…

Lots of fun and laughs and getting caught up.

Today

I ain’t gonna lie. Today was mostly crabby, but there are still a few highlights:

1.|  Sitting on the porch with a fauxjito, reading a book. Still tastes good even though it had no rum.

2.|  No headaches! Sugar and artificial crap-free for six days now. I think my body is starting to get used to it.

3.| Being outside in the sunshine at the Farmer’s Market and having my skin smart a little. I didn’t get sunburnt…just a little sunpinched. I’m especially glad that I can trust Matt to find ways to make all the veggies we bought taste good.

4.| Meat loaf. Meaaaaaatttttloooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaf.

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I was seriously grouchy and irritable today, and was snappish with Matt. It made me think back to a conversation I had with a friend recently.  It was regarding the phrase, “If Momma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.”

I disagree. Not particularly mommas, but anybody. Just because I’m feeling bad, cranky or irritable, does not give me the right to go off on somebody and make them as miserable as I am. I’ve done it before and making others suffer because of my mood is just going to make me feel worse, and like less of a person.

I’ve also heard the phrase, “Feelings are not an excuse for bad behavior.” As much as I feel like someone should “pay” for “making” me feel a certain way, that isn’t the way kind people operate. First of all, if someone acts, that is beyond my control. The only thing I do have control over is how I react. What kind of person I am is encapsulated in that moment of reaction. I get to choose between being mean and being forgiving. I get to choose between keeping it going or ending the argument. I get to choose whether I lash out, or cut someone slack.

I did apologize to Matt, but I shouldn’t have had to. I should have made the right choice in the first place. Then there’s not an injury to repair, or a hole in the fabric to stitch up. Once said, it can never be unsaid. I want to make the right choice, so I am going to work harder at doing that.